Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Mixed messages and moving on

The almost other man came down last weekend to househunt now that he is moving down to Melbourne. He is going to share an apartment with a friend of mine.

Anyway, before he came down he was expressing concern about moving. I explained that he was moving to a city where he had more friends and would be able to be himself. He told me that he was mainly moving to Melbourne because I'd asked him too... He didn't need to tell me that.

He was somewhat withdrawn during his visit... he was tired, stressed about moving and not in the mood for the cocktail party we threw for my and my husband's birthday. So he was not in the mood to deal with large numbers of people.

My new man came along to the party and they both got to meet each other. I was worried that my new and former man wouldn't get along... or that the former one would feel threatened/jealous. They seemed to get along ok and apart from the former man being withdrawn all weekend - things went very well.

I was surprised to find that the power imbalance in the relationship has disappeared. I am also distracted by my new man, and that may have some part to play as well. I think I've moved on. I think I've finally accepted that this relationship is not going to be more than it currently is, and am happy with that for the moment.

Only time will tell of course what my true feelings are. The blush of new love buries many old emotions. I have a shiney new toy to play with.


Blogger ida gasp said...

My dad said recently that he thinks there are people who are addicted to falling in love. When I think about the eventual failure of my 10 year relationship I wonder if I am addicted to falling in love, or if I am obsessional??? I am envious of what you do, as I imagine many people are. It sounds like a hippie/free love utopia, yet I also find the idea really full on.

7:54 pm  

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